Opening a New Door

If you're like me you've heard the phrase: When one door closes, another opens.

And when I say, "like me," I mean anyone who has been out there, fallen flat on their face, and got back up. Which is mostly everyone.

Let's face it, closed doors can be devastating. There in the dark you think you'll never see light again. But this phrase perfectly sums up what life can be like if you allow yourself to hope. Having that hope when going through a divorce with kiddos helped me tremendously. It's what kept me from giving up and keeping that door closed forever. And while opening my new door wasn't always easy, it was the best decision to rediscover parts of myself that had been neglected.

And I should say that going through this new door created more opportunities for more doors. Turns out, there are tons of doors on your life's journey. Some have crummy outcomes, but with hope you know you'll find another door and your outlook on life turns from darkness and endings, into excited anticipation of new beginnings that await you.

Speaking of new doors...

I mentioned my "partner in crime" in my last post; how that one offering of a held hand for support on a hike was the start of fluttering. Mutually experiencing all that energy, we came up with the idea to travel somewhere to experience more adventures with all those butterflies. 

But in the COVID era, we really didn't want to go far from home, and wanted to find safe options. We set our sights on Door County, Wisconsin because it checked all our boxes and called to our sense of  nostalgia. Turns out, despite growing up in different states (Wisconsin & Illinois), both of us spent quite a few summers up in the Wisconsin wilderness with our families.

But where to stay? What to explore?

We stumbled on a fantastic bed and breakfast in Bailey's Harbor. Right on the water with hammocks on every balcony, we felt lucky to sway along with the nighttime stars and cheer on the sunrise with tea. The staff took every precaution and were COVID responsible with social distancing; offering hand sanitizer at every shared area/door, sharing clear information about cleaning and protocols, and delivering a delicious breakfast bag of goodies outside our door every morning. 

Coming home we realized how much we were pampered to hear that knock on the door each morning and a friendly voice saying, "Good morning, breakfast." We wished every morning could be like that!

While on our adventure, we drove along to find great hiking trails and secret beaches that seemed to be just for the two of us. We also had discoveries at two tasty restaurants.

Discussing how the world looks different is a theme I'm sure you can relate. But did you have this discussion with a dreamy guy overlooking the bay side of Lake Michigan at sunset? No? Well I highly recommend it. 

While waiting for our respective wedge salads, beef tenderloin, and halibut at Waterfront in Sister Bay, we discussed how we got here. How the world in that moment, at that table, was familiar but overcast with the new reality of a global pandemic. COVID was very top of mind in our moment.

The discussion led to politics, which we agreed had no place in a pandemic. Public health should be rooted in science and facts. We questioned why this collective moment where all should come together to mitigate its spread and eventually eradicate the virus had turned into such divisiveness. 

Masks are not democratic or republican. Masks are a form of protection for self and others; they save lives. No one is patriotic or unpatriotic for wearing one. This is a calculated and propagated thought to create an "us vs them" scenario. I believe it's done to purposefully separate and divide Americans into thinking each other is the enemy. It's dangerous. 

I know many who disagree with this. And that's okay, but let's talk about it rather than calling each other names and jumping to conclusions that the other is "crazy." We are all afraid of this unknown virus and are lashing out rather than pulling together. I'll hear your fears if you'll hear mine and we agree to do our best to help each other feel less fearful. Deal?

Wouldn't that be great?

What was great was both Waterfront's meal and staff. We started out with the wedge salad that featured a scrumptious buttermilk ranch dressing, bacon, sunflower seeds, cherry tomatoes, and bleu cheese crumbles.

We agreed we never had a wedge salad like this and it was amazing! 

After licking up every bite, we remarked on the view. Waterfront is, well, on the water. Specifically on the bay side of Lake Michigan. It really is fantastic and one of those restaurants that covers it all: atmosphere, service, and great food.

When our main courses arrived, we hoped to keep the good taste vibes going. And boy did we ever! I had the beef tenderloin with whipped potatoes (which were the best I've ever had), stuffed portobello mushrooms, asparagus, shallot compound butter, and a demi glace. 

Two words: Holy Moly!

My partner in crime had the just as amazing halibut with grilled asparagus, lemon Parmesan spring risotto, snap peas, and a ramp pistou pesto.

We capped the night with a stroll along their pier and thought it was just the most perfect night, even in a pandemic.

So how were we going to top that, right?

After another knock on the door for breakfast treats, a sip of tea, and swing in the hammock, we tackled another adventure of sharing favorite stomping grounds and stories of the past. We also stumbled upon the Bailey's Harbor Farmer's Market and found the most beautiful color and display of carrots. If I was closer to home, I would have grabbed a bunch for sure!

As our dinner reservation approached, we made our way back to the B&B to freshen up and then leisurely walked to our next dinner experience at Harbor Fish Market & Grille in Bailey's Harbor. This time we dined outside, but still wore our masks inside until we reached our table.

In their entrance/bar area they had repurposed a TV into a unique fish bowl. Very clever!

When we sat down, we savored the perfect weather and view of Lake Michigan. The atmosphere was perfect for sharing stories of how we grew up and the relationships with family, specifically with grandparents.  

What our conversation revealed, was how these relationships left more than just memories. For my partner in crime, his exposure to care giving for grandparents at an early age created a deeply rooted personality trait. Before hearing these stories, I was taken aback by not only his empathy, but also his confidence to be vulnerable. He wants to care for others. Dare I say he's driven to do so. But it wasn't until hearing how his dad lost his dad at such an early age that I understand where this mannerism comes from.

His dad became the caretaker of his family, his mom, when he was still developing into a young man. He took on this new reality and responsibility to heart and was committed to making sure all were cared for. When his grandmother was older and needed help, my partner in crime watched how his dad took her in and the entire family cared for the matriarch until she passed away. My partner in crime learned early on what care giving for family and unconditional love looks like. And when he shared how his family took in his maternal grandmother for the same reasons, it was crystal clear why he does what he does. 

Serving those he loves drives his bus. It's as much a part of who he is as the blue of his eyes.

So when he says he wants to drive, or use my lawnmower to cut my grass, or fix any of the little things I've been putting off at my house, I know it comes from a genuine place of care. I know he sincerely means the offer and where it's coming from. I've learned to let go of my independent nature and become filled with gratitude when he makes these offers. After hearing this story, it all makes sense and I learned how to open a new door. 

I was able to share caring for my own paternal grandmother when I was in college. She lived not too far from my campus and I would go to her apartment once a week my senior year to help arrange all her pills in her weekly pill organizer. Her eyesight wasn't the greatest, but she was as sharp as a tack! 

I shared how, at first, in my 20 year-old and naive mind, I thought it would be a hassle to make this weekly stop with my heavy class load and my even heavier heart with my dad (her son) dying of cancer. At that point we had been preparing for the inevitable for the last year when hearing the 2 year diagnosis. 

But it was those weekly visits that shifted my thinking and was the thing that held me together. 

I learned how my grandmother taught K-12 in a one-room schoolhouse in rural Oshkosh before she was married. She was lucky enough to go to college, but at that time women were only allowed to choose between nursing and teaching. She would show letters from past students with me that would arrive every Christmas. My grandmother had stopped teaching nearly 60 years earlier and still received cards. This was a special thing to learn and share with her.

I knew my grandmother was special because she endured my grandfather. He was an outspoken Irishman who left school and home in 8th grade to avoid working on the farm. He found the rails and learned about life from town to town as he got jobs as a farmhand and cowboy across the country. When money ran out, he'd jump back on the moving boxcar to find another gig.

When he returned to Wisconsin to settle down, marry, and start a family, his work found him at the beginnings of the labor movement. Finding purpose and unleashing his natural leadership abilities, he would regularly come home to my grandmother and his four kids in a bloody mess from being beat up by those who fought against decent wages and working conditions. He was a tough guy and even tougher to get a word in edgewise. I recall our weekly 2-3 hour family visits as a youngster and never hearing anyone other than my grandfather and father.

But now I got to hear just Agnes. And boy did she have some stories!

She shared not only how she loved to teach, but also how she loved to dance. Since my grandfather was able to dance in a fight but not on the dance floor, my grandmother found her outlet at the Eagles Ballroom. And it was there she met the love of her life.

As I heard stories of her great love, how he passed away from a rapid illness at such a young age, and how my grandfather never knew, I saw her in a different light. As a woman who endured so much and was still standing. It was in awe of her stories and of her. It wasn't until years later that I began to appreciate her and her stories even more as I went through my own journey and my own doors.

This was quite the dinner conversation! So open. So jam-packed with vulnerability. Shazam!

When our dinners arrived, we kept the good vibes and openness going. I had the halibut cheeks, which was sauteed with a sundried tomato cream sauce with pappardelle pasta. 

\

And my partner in crime had the the blackened whitefish which was served New Orleans style with spicy Cajun compound butter, a baked potato, and asparagus. So delish!

While the meal at Harbor Fish Market & Grille was tasty, we agreed it was hard to top Waterfront. Although our service and the atmosphere at Harbor was just as fantastic!

But it was the conversation at Harbor that opened more doors of awareness and discovery. The light that I said awaits you when opening new doors was right there.

And to finish this off with some sweetness...

On the drive home we stopped off at the Cedar Crest Ice Cream Factory & Parlor in Manitowoc. The folks here were also considerate and COVID responsible with masks and social distancing. We waited in line patiently and took our creamy goodness outside to sit near the massive brown and white cow that marks the ice cream spot. We shared our black cherry (which is THE best black cherry ice cream ever) and cookies and cream. This was the best way to cap an already perfect weekend. 

Stay tuned for some tasty breakfast posts in the near future as I tackle remaking some dishes I discovered in a local farm-to-table joint! Until then, let me know what you think and enjoy the latest Taste for Wandering soundtrack, which features songs that were in my world during this trip and posting:

A Taste For Wandering Soundtrack #3:

Let's Groove, Earth Wind & Fire

Better Be Good To Me, Tina Turner

Teacher, Nick Jonas

Hotter Than Hell, Dua Lipa

Earned It, The Weekend